Friday, December 25, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Christmas Wrap-up

Well, Christmas ended 35 minutes ago, so before i sign off here, I
wanted to share the best gift I got this year. No, it wasn't the
"Greyskull" Chuck Taylors with the pirate-style skull and crossbones
on the tongues. And not the remote controlled R2-D2.* Even better
than the vintage-still-in-original-packaging 1984 Stormtrooper action
figure**! It's my newest purple shirt!

Happy Holidays to all, and to all a purple borealis night!

* Well, no, not really.
**Again, not really. Notice a theme this year? And I bought the
giver of this gift a 12-inch Yoda Christmas tree topper

Monday, December 14, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Revenge of the (Purple) Creature

Dear Diary. I'm sorry I've not written you in a long time. I was all
set to, but got very busy. And you know, as soon as you don't do
something, it's much easier to keep not doing it. Which is why I
don't eat cauliflour. Why start when I can just keep not eating it?*

It's a shame, too, because I really had a good need to share something
with the world at large. You see, a great evil force was at work
against the land of Purpledom. You see, my day job involves me
fighting the armies of bad taste as a graphic designer. So on this
particular day in mid-November, I was designing something for a
client. A well-known household name, and it was pretty cool to work
on it since I've used some of their stuff. Anyway, my work came out
pretty nice I thought, and so I sent my design over to them, expecting
it to go over well. Coincidentally, the design was primarily Purple.
But then I got an email back saying "So-and-so person isn't going to
like this because they don't like Purple." Say WHAT??? This was like
the compulsive lip-licking that some of the bad-guys in Harry Potter
do - they may look like everyone else, but there's that little tip-off
that tells you "watch out, either they are a Deatheater or they still
haven't washed off the bit of egg yolk off of their face since
breakfast and are still trying to get to it." So obviously they were
evil-incarnate in this case.

Now, here's the problem. The design itself was solid, and they liked
it. Not liking a color is seldom grounds for dismissing the design.
You eliminate entire color palates that way, don't judge based on what
you would or wouldn't paint your living room in. But more
importantly, the color I chose was THE DOMINANT COLOR OF THEIR LOGO!!!

To counteract this demon, I share with you a mighty and vibrant purple
(not to be confused with mighty purple...that's for another
conversation) top a friend of mine wore to the Tenth of July Mustache
and Tag Sale Party. (By this point she had lost her mustache; she did
play by the rules earlier in the evening...)

Hopefully this now restores balance to the Purple Force.


*Exception: My friend Ankita makes awesome home-made Indian food. She
tricked me into eating cauliflour. I still haven't forgiven her for
that, but in the meantime will still gladly eat everything she puts in
front of me.** Kind of like my friend Rob's mom when i was growing up
- I didn't realize that broccoli didn't have to be nauseating until I
had it stir-fried Asian style.***

**This pokes a hole in my platform, doesn't it?

***However these two exceptions to the perennial list of "Things Your
Kids Won't Eat" might be the end of my breaks with tradition. Serve
me brussels sprouts and you're at LEAST looking at a broken window as
i defenestrate the dinner.****

****I always liked that word. "Defenestrate". On another note, I
used to like the pun "Extinguish the cat" as in "put the cat
out(side)". Though to do so through a pane of glass would be hard on
the kitty, so these two things are completely unrelated.*****

*****Where was I???

Friday, November 13, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Cookie Time! (A year of purple)

Sorry I'm late again with the posting, but I've been celebrating! As
you all no doubt know, last week heralded two major dates in recent
history - my birthday and the one year anniversary of the Purple Shirt
of the Week!

Obviously, with these two events, not only have I been celebrating,
but going through the bags and bags of mail that I received from
around the world to mark these occasions. (Yup, apparently many of you
still use the post as a viable method of letter-sending. And for that
I thank you, because it means the postal service won't cut back on
Saturday delivery, which would cut into my Netflix deliveries.)

Well, now that I'm back, and before we resume to the fall collection
of purple shirts for this year (yes, getting back on track with the
upper body apparel...soon), I wanted to share with you the cookies
that were made for me on my birthday by my girlfriend Kim. See that
frosting? Ain't it cool? Nothing better than a good cookie - it's a
single serving, it's portable, it's everything you ever need in a
treat. And it comes in chocolate. Ren & Stimpy once performed a work
on the topic of logs, and I must say, I feel very much the same about
the humble cookie.

I've gotten some other purple-themed gifts over the past few weeks,
which is very cool; and I don't think we're headed for a problem in
that department, unlike The Great Elmo Impasse of 1995.*

So thank you. Its wonderful to have so many adoring fans.

-your purple highness (or pain in the highness)

*The Great Elmo Impasse of 1995 began with a simple event, or, in
retrospect, a poor decision on my part (isn't that how so many of my
stories begin?). I was in high school and had started dating a girl
(who's merits of intelligence are questioned for other reasons in a
song called "Chiaroscuro" on the upcoming record, for those of you
keeping track of such things). Girl and I went to the mall on one of
our first dates, and wandered around aimlessly, as high school kids
are wont to do. Well, i decided to make it a scavenger hunt - let's
spot Elmo! Now, mind you, in 1994 (yes, this begins in 1994, I'll get
there), Elmo was not the ubiquitous icon that he is today. Why was I
thinking of Elmo of all things? Well, the girl I had not-really-dated-
but-i-wasn't-stalking-let's-just-say-i'm-slow-to-get-the-point just
prior to Girl was a big Elmo fan. So somehow that was still on my
mind... You know how your Aunt that one time said in passing that she
thought frogs were cute, and for the next 5 years everyone bought her
frog-related gifts for every holiday? Yeah, that's pretty much what
happened for the next year and a half. By the end of that
relationship, I had received about 16-18 Elmos, most of which were for
Christmas 1995, just when I thought the smoke had cleared and I'd seen
the end of the fuzzy little guy. And it wasn't because I kept bringing
him up! Nope, she just took that ball and ran with it. Hard. It took
me a long time to finally tell her I never really had a thing for
Elmo; every time I thought it would be a good time**, I would be
quagmired in more red muppet. I don't remember what happened to the
three-foot tall Elmo i got, but rest assured, none of them remain!

**When I finally did tell her "hey, this elmo thing's cute, but i
think i have enough now", we were in the car on our way to a party
somewhere. And she took it to mean that all of her gifts ever given
were horrible and that I was breaking up with her before we got to the
party where all my friends were at and she knew no one. In
retrospect, I probably should have gone with the flow on that one***,
but that's hindsight for you.

***Have I mentioned I'm slow sometimes?

Friday, October 30, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Rock and Roll Tiger!

The annual holiday record for Talking to Walls' Asylum fan club
started getting pieced together last weekend. I got this keychain
while I was at CMJ last week (note the Mohawk and earings), which
prompted the first track to be recorded:

Rock and roll tiger!
Rock and roll tiger!
Rock and roll tiger!
Rock and roll tiger!
Rock and roll tiger -
You know he'll never let you down!

Rock and roll tiger!
Rock and roll tiger!
Rock and roll tiger!
Rock and roll tiger!
Rock and roll tiger -
You know he's not a tiny bear!

Trust me, it all does make sense...

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Going National

Much like what I hope to be the future fortune of our next record, the
Purple Movement has gone national! See for yourself - good 'ol Dave's
on board!

Friday, October 16, 2009

foiled again...and again

Damn you for refusing my images via email publishing! what good are you!


Purple Shirt of the Week: American Pop Art Lesson

Hey Look! I work with one of the most motivating women in America!

Unfortunately, which she should have been able to retire since her service in WWII, she's facing some tough financial times thanks to some bad investments placed in the the early 1990's. But she still manages to galvanize the workforce.

However, her name is not Rosie The Riveter, as you might have expected. It's Molly the Mycarta Molder. I know, i was surprised too. A wikipedia search on my co-worker eventually led me to this link:

And now you know.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Scary and dead

There's a man walking home alone at night, and there is a "BUMP…BUMP…
BUMP" behind him. He walks faster and looks back, making out an image
of an upright coffin banging it's way down the middle of the street
towards him…

"BUMP … BUMP…BUMP…" The man begins to run towards his home, and the
coffin bounces after him faster…faster…BUMPBUMPBUMP.

He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door… locks
it…and the coffin crashes through his door and the lid to the coffin
begins to lift open, bumping towards him.

The man runs to the bathroom and locks himself, heart pounding, and
CRASH, the coffin breaks down the door, coming slowly towards him, the
man screaming…

the man reaches for something, anything…

and he finds a box of cough drops and throws them at the coffin…

and the coffin stops.

this photo was taken during our bachelor party that was at Six Flags.
they were all set up for the Halloween Fright Fest. Of course they
had purple coffins...

sorry for the lapse in blog posts, theres been a lot going on. Should
be back to normal now, so rest easy.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Friday, September 11, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Irony's the way to describe a shirt that was recently pressed,
worn for an afternoon, and then hung back up in the closet crammed in
with your other (probably purple) shirts. It's *mostly* good.

Certainly would be in better shape than that black shirt with the
french cuffs I carried around on tour last month to every show and
only ended up wearing twice because of rushed load-ins or whatever -
forever stuffed in a bag, sometimes aired out (translation: taken out
of the bag while rummaging for a toothbrush, etc, and left on the
floor until the next morning), and almost lost the cufflinks on a
rooftop in Washington DC. I know I wasn't getting those back if that
happened. But that story ends happily. And the other happy ending is
probably that I didn't wear the shirt more, for the sake of our fans
after the show. For anyone who's seen what goes into a live TtW show,
you know it means a lot of sweat all around, with about three shirts a
night for yours truly (load-in, show, and something non-offensive
(wet) to greet people in after the show before the load-out).

None of this has anything to do with friend Sharon's photo. She is
giving the two thumbs up, which is completely NOT how I feel regarding
this sudden invasion of wet new england autumn into my life. Hence
the irony. See?

And now you probably know too much about tour hygiene. And now
understand why sometimes band members start raiding their own merch
case for something to wear. (Ah, the multiple i84 breakdown in '07 on
the way to Worcester...)

Friday, September 4, 2009

foiled again

reposted blog with image that didn't load. i now have my suspicions about what's going on here...

Purple Shirt of the Week: You'll be seeing more of this soon enough...

Here we are, my rabid purple fans, in the first week of September. Summer is over, forget when the equinox says it is. It's September, when school starts, weather gets cooler and the first "R" month you can go back to eating oysters.

Speaking of, I have maintained for many years that I would not eat sushi. My reasoning being that we are evolved enough as a species that we can cook our food and not eat animals right after being killed without the appropriate amount of cooking time. I'm pretty open minded about food, but come on. (Cerveche cooks in the lemon juice? Yeah right, now many flaming lemons have you seen outside of a Village People commercial for Tropicana?)

I was in Washington DC this summer when my friend's husband was REALLY wanting to go to a raw bar in the Foggy Bottom district where all the rich and/or powerful peeps eat; the thought being the food would be excellent and as fresh as you could get it. And I wanted no part of the menu. Until I realized that perhaps I had been hypocritical, recalling I had, as a child, eaten oysters rockerfeller, which, of course, is raw. Well, when in Rome... I ignored the creepy realization of what I was eating and went for it.

So I guess when TtW tours Asia and we are in Tokyo for 2 nights, I will break down and have the sushi...

It the meantime, here is a shawl that will help keep you warm as you go a-Travelin'

Friday, August 28, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Back to my closet...

This is how i felt all week. Nuff said...

(I bet you thought I was out of purple shirts to wear, didn't you?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: A slightly more attractive house

Er, friend Katie found this in her travels. It's less garish than
that last house I's a little more...special in the cute/
planned sort of way?

Last week I helped my friend paint her new house. (She is a lover of
purple, but not like the attached house's owner.) This was not the
first house i have seen where the prior owner painted rooms all one
color - INCLUDING THE TRIM! i don't care if you are design
challenged, it's just a no-no and you should feel pangs of regret as
soon as you do it and force yourself to fix it. (See the full purple
house a couple of weeks ago for how badly it was executed with the
foundation the same color as all else).

Anyway, the color of the trim could have been forgiven if it weren't
for the living room. It was brilliant 1980s Miami Vice PINK. but it
gets worse. someone decided to get creative. You know how you can
get painting textures with a sponge or a rag? and how you get two
colors in a random, textured pattern? yeah, they did this in the pink
room. and what was the accent color they sponged with? GREY. Dull,
ugly grey. It looked like there had been wallpaper that was peeled
off and the glue was still on the wall. no, it was grey paint.*

so in light of that, this here is my dream home. as light in the
loafers as it may be. i'm a sucker for victorian-styled anything.
Including victorian-period robot gentlemen in tuxes and top hats. but
that's another story for another time that has nothing to do with the
color purple and therefore is trivial and not worth mentioning. so i

*there is a happy ending. we repainted and the colors my friend
picked came out very nicely.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Miles to go...

Well, internet has been spotty lately since we've been on the road, so
this blog's a little late.

Lots of miles traversed. Lots of foods consumed. Lots of peoples
met. Lots of songs played.

A few years ago a spring tour ended in Los Angeles, and as i had a
couple of days to kill, i walked around town. Stuff to see, etc.
Problem was, public transit out there is awful and i didn't have any
option other than walking (besides, i had run out of money and the one
cab i was able to take i stiffed him part of the bill - yikes!)

The only shoes I had were some converse sneakers. Which really hurts,
even when you get new sole inserts. I messed up my knee for weeks
after that. But still, saw what I could.

This tour we have my car with us (there's just 3 of us - Nat, myself
and different merch/general helpers) so we can get by without the gas
guzzling Ricardo. Today in Philly we'll be doing a lot of walking,
despite the car, most likely, as we're doing the equivalent of three
shows. You'd think I'd be smarter and NOT wear my chucks.


Friday, August 7, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Sundresses and Summer Days

Here we are, on a cooler morning in August, a reminder that fall will
soon be on it's way. Which in and of itself signals that summer is
over. Anytime you are reminded that something is about to end, you
are then living under the burden of that realization, consciously or
not. Making plans to get them in while there is still time. Or
critiquing your lack of efficiency of time use, before your epiphany.

Wow, can I use some more big words in there? I must acquiesce that
that is feasible.

Anyway, here's to the end of summer, the last run-up to autumnal
rituals that in themselves bring us to winter - a rounding up of goods
and foodstuffs, a battening down before the weather and our self-
imposed winter quarantines. I swear it was only a few weeks ago when
I could inhale that first summer shower, the kind that blends in with
the pavement and reminds you of a time when you didn't know or care
enough to come in out of the rain. A viciously vivid scent that makes
you stop mid-stride and take note. An old friend in your cerebral
cortex that never ages, and pops up by your kitchen window to say
"hullo! remember me? can you come out to play?", only to be rebuffed
by the mounting responsibilities of adulthood with an off-hand "maybe
later". The greater the distance, the greater the ease of that casual
dismissal until the words are no longer meant or felt.

For myself, I desire to play the role of grasshopper against the noble
ant. A necessary, vicarious martyr not to be followed but to be
watched and lighten the humors of those surrounding. Whether that
desire feeds into action...doubtful. But hopeful. For there is
always hope. Especially where there are sundresses.

Thanks Angela!

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Hair today, purple tomorrow

Before the summer tour season started for us last week I decided it
was time to dye my air again. The sun and pool had beaten the color
of my hair into something unplanned, and it was just feeling time.

"Purple Passion" came out darker than I was expecting, but that's
what I get for refusing to bleach my hair in order to get a better
purple or cranberry. I know, I know...

But here's a shot from the last time i dyed it:

Friday, July 24, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Vests

Ok, so I missed last week for no good reason. So my penance for today is to dress like an idiot and pull out the VEST.

in my defense, I've never worn this in public before. I'm actually not sure why I still own it. I did not buy it myself. I think I'm waiting to wear it under a tux or something. Though the last tuxedo jacket I wore....well, that wouldn't go too well.

And yes, I'm wearing my purple chucks...

Friday, July 10, 2009

fixed images....again....

damn you blogger for not taking my pics from my email!!!!


Purple Shirt of the Week: Sock it to me!

I've been rather behind on my news reading, RSS feeds, etc. Been traveling, running low on batteries, etc. So I didn't realize that when my friend Ann was making me a pair of socks to thank me for helping her with some design layouts for her knitting, she had been referring to them on her blog as the "talking to socks" pattern. Very cute name. And very awesome gift!

Here they are, in all their glory! they're hand-dyed marino wool. the picture kinda shows the cool variations in the colors throughout the sock. But as you can see, I may be overdoing it in the purple enthusiasm department. but then again, that's exactly how it's meant to be done!

Just got them this week, which means i've pushed back the 15 or so other submissions and shots I've taken. So fear not, the purple shall be with you always...Or at least for the next 3 months...there, doesn't that make you feel better?

now go outside and play, because it's gorgeous...

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Helloooo Nurse!

You are so lucky that I bless you all each week with the color
purple. Because really, is there anything else in life? And I know
it gives your life meaning. Because you tell me so. Let's go to the
mail bag and see what you've written:

Dear Brian;
How can I live, week to week, knowing that at any moment you may
decide to stop showing us purple pictures?? Please, please, don't
stop! I didn't understand what point there was to life and living
until your blog came along. I now have seen truth and beauty
contained in your words and pictures, and shall relish each day hereon
with the knowledge that there are others like me out there. Thank you
for bringing us this community. I am in your debt. Now excuse me
while I go braid some purple ribbons in my hair." - G. Clinton

I'm paraphrasing, of course, but the sentiment is the same.

On a serious note, hundreds of you (read: more than one but less than
three) have told me a similar story which, now that I have photos, I
have no excuse not to share. Nothing can be as heart-wrenching as
having a sick child whom you have to bring to the hospital, doing all
you & the doctors can to make their life better. These friends of
mine wrote me and said "while i was at the hospital, there was a
doctor/nurse with purple scrubs on, it reminded me of your blog, and I

Anything that can bring a smile to that kind of situation, I'm glad to
have been a part of it. But most importantly, I share this story so
you know that you're not alone.

Oh, and 6 points to the first person to comment on this post who can
tell me where this week's title comes from.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: The Price of Admission

No, this has nothing to do with my feelings of being robbed of my
money and time after seeing Transformers 2 last night (the movie
missed our low expectations - how?!?!?!?!)

I spent last week at the Ritz Carlton in Orlando for my day job (I
would confidently say i was probably one of their more unusual guests
they've had, given what i put some of the staff through; but the
lakers we staying there as well, so who knows what those guys do in
their off time...) Anyway, I was with Pete, and as we neared the end
of our stay he wanted to grab something for Father's Day - something
golf-related at the pro shop. ok, makes sense.

What didn't make sense was a polo shirt that cost $95. heck, pay
another $30 and you can upgrade that shirt to a whole bathrobe! Only
now as i type this does it seem like that bathrobe was a bargain.

So if you want to wear purple and play with the rich kids, you have to
pay the cover charge.

Michael Bay could afford this shirt. Maybe he bought a couple of
shirts, a bathrobe and some pants and then realized he had no money to
got some writers from the clearance bin and made his movie while
wearing his nice overpriced shirts.

I think that's what happened. So it's that clerk in the pro shop's
fault that I wasted 9 million hours of my life last night in the movie
theatre next to kids who were too young to be there but daddy wanted
to see it.


Monday, June 22, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Martinis and More!

well, i am so far behind schedule here i'm going to end up ahead of myself. Though last time it wasn't my fault...

This is a compilation issue. I didn't have regular internet access for the last two friday, and i have non-shirt subjects, so here's what we've got: pictures from the last 10 days.

First up: what better than a well mixed martini than a martini in a light-up glass to serve it in? Better still, make that martini glass glow purple!

Sorry about the photo, it was a vivid purple, but my iphone camera is only so good. it turned the stem green, but you can see the purple aura around the glass. that's what I'm talking about!!

Up next is the reason why i was out of contact for 10 days - i was working on a show that i designed. Now, as opposed to the above picture, this was originally NOT purple, but blue. I specifically didn't want people who might know about my blog thinking i designed a purple stage. plus, blue looks better on video cameras. well, as the photographer informed me, an uncorrected digital photo of blue light will make it look purple. i dunno, but the pics came out purple. so had to share.

the second photo is backstage at my "command center" and that's glen my video guy. thats where i first noticed the purple photos coming out.

ok, that's it, more other stuff for me to do. go away. but tune in next week (though i guess that means later this week so i'm caught up) for a fab purple shirt i saw in my travels.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Put down the brush and step away from the can...

Ever have those moments where you ask yourself "is this a good idea?"
If you have, then it probably means it isn't.

These people, while clearly admirable in their love of the purple,
went just a LITTLE too far over it. I mean, they even painted the
foundation for Pete's sake! I guess that word of my blog is spreading
and these people are just big fans, as this house is just down at the
other end of my street.

I appeciate you enthusiasm. Truely. It touches me that you would go so
far as to paint your house to be on this blog. But really, I think
you've gone too far on this one. I'm sorry, but there, I've said it.

Now back to our postings of shirts and socks...

Friday, June 5, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Get your Kicks

Here is a submission from my friend QuirkyNYChick. She just bought
new shoes. They're awesome. So is she and her musical tastes, but
that's another story.

I'm tired and it's been a very long week. So I have no embarrassing
personal stories. Maybe next week.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Older and Wiser

Here we have a lavender (ie light purple - sorry, it's my phone camera, the color isn't too accurate) shirt on someone who wished not to have their face shown on the blog this week. I only mention this for two reasons: first, this person's picture is already plastered around the internets, and secondly, he's making such an awesome face in the picture that it's a crime that it's not being shared.

I suspect that this not sharing has something to do with the fact that yes, even though he may be a recognized maven of information and has photo profiles on websites, twitter, etc, he draws some kind of line between "i'm a professional" and "i don't need to have goofy pictures of myself on the internet".

I know, i know, i don't understand it either. I for one hope i never make that distinction. but, then again, look at what i do with my life; and not having that brain filter probably means i won't have a reputation where goofy photos will matter or come back to haunt me in a negative way. i don't have much further to fall.

Anyway, we salute you, man in the pretty purple shirt! You go and rock that lavender!

To view this blog as a web page go to
To be removed from this list, click here. And then click again...

Friday, May 15, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: This is a happy blog, darn it!

I really didn't feel like doing a blog today, but then realized that
the fortunes of you, dear readers, are completely tied to my public
musings here week after week. And today a lot of us probably need
some sunshine and flowers.

I know i do. I just took a walk outside, so there's my sunshine.

Here's my flowers for you. The original pic i took was one of the
ones lost on my iphone the other week, and the original point was that
i hadn't mowed yet and i was amazed that EVEN THE WEEDS GROWING INTO

It was a sign. trust me, it was there.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: The end of sleeve season

Sorry there was no post last week - I had taken some AWESOME purple
pics on my new iPhone but then had problems and the guys at the apple
store had to wipe the phone. After that I just isn't feel like
blogging because these were that good.

I still haven't got my photos syncing to my laptop, so you'll have to
wait until next week for my photoshopped pic of tim's lavender shirt.

So in the meantime, enjoy one of the last sleeved ensembles you'll be
seeing here for the season

Friday, April 24, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: There's no place like home

Remember the shoe discussion a while back? well, friend Michele went
and got herself some purple sneakers at that sale and she wanted to
share them with all of you this week.

This has been a bad week, so i'll make this short. I'm hoping that if
i put these on and click my heels, i'll be home and it will have been
a dream.

I also hope that blogger doesn't screw up and send this out with no
photo attached again.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Blogger, you're killing me

yet again blogger's dropped the ball and no pic went through. sorry all.

Purple Shirt of the Week: This person is NOT an argyle

Welcome back folks to another edition of "Purple Shirt of the Week". I'm your host, Barney, and this week we'll be taking a look at one of the dressier pieces we've had in our collection.

Last week I was hanging out with some friends from college at a bar on a Friday night, and the short version of the story is that one of them had had enough drinks to start to worry about her running into someone that she used to know who had a crush on her. But she quickly was able to feel better about it because regardless of any insecurities on her part, this guy was wearing an argyle sweater vest. And in her drunken reasoning, this was case enough that she won - that the guy was dressed like an idiot. Our table was agreeing - a guy hanging out in trendy yuppie south norwalk on a friday night wearing an argyle sweater vest didn't really meet up with our elitist standards for friend making. this guy was either boring or a meathead. as were the other two similarly-attired gentlemen at the bar listening to a bad cover band.

No offense to any meatheads out there reading this. And hang in there, I'm going somewhere with all this.

My second story, which is much shorter, revolves around a person I used to work with. For sake of keeping him anonymous, we'll call him Sary Gtager. This guy was, and is, a complete moron (no offense to any morons reading this). I mean, maybe he's smart and a leader in his industry, but he has the social graces of a...person with no social graces. One day, my friend Carrie, who had had enough of him, and is prone to stating the obvious in such a clear way that other people aren't quite abel to, addressed to everyone in general "Sary Gtager is such an...wait, i said i was going to be nice this week, begins with an "a" and ends with an "e", you know what I mean." To which I called in from the next room, "argyle??"

Thus began a great codeword, that ties in nicely with the previous story.

Taking a 180 now, on to today's picture. The complete antonym to everything I just said, this is my friend Sue (not Eyore girl from a few weeks back). She is the furthest thing from a meathead or "being an argyle". In fact, and this is in all honesty (after reading this blog at for the past few months, i think you can gauge my level of being honest in a "way too much information" sort of way), she's one of the nicest people I've had the pleasure to work with at any of my day jobs, even in the face of her usually being way over-worked. And she's got quite the snappy wardrobe, always dressed with attention to detail.

So, if you want a lesson on how to be awesome, take a lesson from Sue. If you want to be a rude clod, talk to Sary.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Doc Doc Goose

Well, since two people have told me about purple footwear this
morning, it's only fitting that I bust out my Doc Martins that I've
been saving for a special occasion. I bought these in Toronto years
ago. I was deciding between a replacement of my completely worn-
through red pair (and the replacement wasn't nearly as cool as the
original, and would need some "doc-toring up") or these purple ones.
My girlfriend at the time said "you know, if you pass these up you'll
be kicking yourself because they're so rare and cool and you keep
coming back to them".


Now, I've seen it before: my posting of my wardrobe on this blog may
make some of you dash out to the store in the attempt to look just
like me. I understand, it's natural, and I'm more than a little
touched that I've inspired so many of you. But please, take a moment
to heed the warning that I just read on the AP wire: "Are you talking
about the purple shoes in Walmart? Because they're recalling them -
the little heel strappy thing breaks off."

But apparently the shoes at are ok.

Now go forth, in the vein attempt to catch up to my trend-leading
fashion repertoire, and get that GDP growing again!

To be removed from this mailing, simply reply with "That don't look
like no shirt" and your request will be politely denied.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Lost in Transmission

Much like the fax you sent me from your attorney, the image in that
last email seems to have gotten lost. It has been restored and posted
on the blog:

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: I don't think she made this herself

My friend Ann makes a lot of sweaters. And socks. And scarves. And hats. And gloves. And barometric pressure gauges.

If it's made of yarn, she can whip it up double time. Now, I'm not one to recognize or know much about women's fashions (except for that time at H&M where I found what I wanted in the women's section...I'm probably digressing more than I should here), but there's some pretty cool stuff she makes. Now, after all that set-up, this isn't one of them. It's off the rack. Unlike the socks on this blog from a few months ago.

Just don't ask her about making doilies.

To unsubscribe from this list, please forward a copy of the fax from your attorney that I conveniently lost when you last tried to get off this list. I'll get it this time. I promise.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Such a Tease

So some of our readers will recognize this shirt from it's mention a
while, not the black shirt with purple trim. It's a shirt
i'll never wear in public.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Ready, Set, Bed!

So after this week's green episode, I was going to play my hand and wear something i've been saving for the purple blog... but i'm leaving for the show tonight straight from work and i don't want to look like a carnival barker...

A few weeks ago we were hanging out at my friend Tracy's house, and our friend Sue came over. She looked ready for bed, and i think this expression shows just how done she was with all of us...

Friday, March 13, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Necessity Breeds Strange Blog Fellows

So about 5 minutes ago I was walking and saw someone I needed to talk
to. So i took out my ipod earbuds and stowed them in my pocket. In
the process of wrapping them up, he happened to see the ipod i was
using. but before i go further, a story...

I'm addicted to my ipod something fierce. Truth be told, I'm an
itunes/ipod user, and find the interface easy and configurable; the
whole system just works for me and i don't see it going away any time
soon. all of which is important, because i have a 23,000 song library
that's floating somewhere north of 95GB in size. It's not my being an
apple fanboy; the whole integrated system was appealing to me when i
first investigated replacing my wall of CDs with something more
manageable and flexible. My ipod is a white 60GB model i found on
clearance (one of the first color ones, the Photo version, for those
asking). Anyway, the point of this backstory is that my MP3
collection is very important to me, as my old CDs are boxed up in the
attic, and i've been buying mostly digital-only in the past 2 years to
keep down the personal item ownership.

So it was with great distress that my ipod started dying about a year
ago. i've resurrected it a few times since then, but it's down for
the count now, as of last week. So while i scrounge the cash to buy a
new one, my girlfriend suggested i borrow hers, because i can't go
without music in the car or anywhere else, and she never uses hers (it
was found in a parking lot, brand new, never registered even - we were
honest and checked!)

Problem #1: It's pink.

Problem #2: It's a 4GB nano.

Problem #3: it's pink.

Problem #4: it's only 4GB

So it's no long term fix, and right now, the color is really not
jiving with my having woken up this morning in a brooding & pseudo
destructive mood and really needing to load up the ipod with old
Nirvana. Dark angry with pink nano. um, yeah, right.

So anyway, Tim (the person i stopped to talk to; remember, this is a
story that just happened) thought as i pulled it out that it was
purple, and that it should go on the blog. After i corrected him and
he saw it, we debated the merit of making it purple for real - would
be less PINK and my girlfriend likes purple better anyway. But i'd
have to get something else anyway because it's not mine and it's too
small. (But i shall point out I'm grateful for having anything right
now - driving with the laptop on the front seat is not quite safe for
skipping tracks, and i can only listen to so many podcasts that last
the length of my commute!)

I've color corrected this image so that you can see what tim saw. and
so i look less foolish on the internet holding a pink freakin ipod.

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rest of your blog-cellmates will just laugh at you for trying....

Friday, March 6, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Marching to Your Own

This week's image works on a number of levels. I find myself thinking
about drums a lot lately. We have a show tomorrow night, our first in
NYC, so there's that (asking a drummer to hurry up load-in in a
cramped venue with 4 other bands is like asking cheese to be made
faster - it just takes a certain amount of time, can't rush it. and
the result is good, so just suck up and deal). In the van the other
day Jeff, our new bassist, started the discussion about our individual
writing processes, and i realized these days I'm very excited by drum
sounds (hearing Krupa in the studio this summer made me wish we could
turn around and do a jazz album instead, the room sounded great and
warm). And finally, with the new U2 album out, my favorite thing so
far is the drumming and programming, influenced by the recording and
writing in North Africa (i'll spare you my full thoughts on this new
record, and it changes every day so far anyway).

So, that's why this is a drumset and not a shirt. This was a kit that
came onstage after us about a month ago, snapped with my camera phone.

Friday, February 27, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: The Enforcer

Well there, Purple People, it's time for another installment of your
favorite blog. I know, i know, i missed last week. some weeks i get
a little late and slipshod, but last week just blew by with nothing.
Mia culpa.

I know when i am late or missing posting, because i actually start
hearing about it from people. Multiple people. Which tells me that
you people need to get out and go do something, just as badly as I
need to.

The person who really brings down the law is Katie, because I see her
almost every day. (Laura also facebooks me regularly about my missing
posts too, but i don't have a purple pic of her to share...HINT)

So if you want to know what a skull-busting enforcer that would bring
a Terminator to its knees looks like, here you go.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Strong Like Bull

Or maybe that's "full of bull"...

Sorry for the missing post on Friday. I was unloading road cases from
a 42 foot semi (and then putting them back on said truck) so I never
got to it. And with the long weekend...that now makes this a doubled-
up week.

Whew, hope you can handle that much purple.

Anyway, I'm a rather buff individual, so all that work was pretty
easy. I could have done it all myself, but it's more fun with a
friend... Actually, it was "bring a friend to the theatre" night this
weekend - anyone of hale body was needed, to get this show loaded out
as fast as possible (16 local crew on load in, for your reference).
But I have no friends, only imaginary people i pretend to talk to on
blog posts as if someone's reading. Kind of like writing to your
diary in 6th grade about how you kissed Michael Cantore after the're writing to a book, it can't talk back, and you'd be
mortified if someone who could actually respond read it - like your
mother, OMG...

*I never kissed a boy, liked it, or got involved with lip balm
fetishes. Any similarities to people living or dead are
coincidental. Michael was a popular kid in my class growing up, and I
think every girl in the class had a huge crush on him, even going so
far as to stage a production of a 2nd grade reunion when we were in
6th grade or so. Therefore, for this blog, i think he's into guys
now, just for the irony of it. I've just recently started talking to
people from grammar school, so what's a little dream crushing if they
read this, eh? (And if i've accidentally outed someone i've not seen
in 25 years from before we knew what boy and girl parts were and who
will never read, i'm sorry. It just slipped out.)
Actually, no, he's probably married with 7 kids and living on a farm
with a small wooden house in Minnesota.

Oh wait, that was Michael Landon...

Friday, February 6, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: A Cautionary Tale

So, you know how you see someone with a bright purple shirt, and
you're all like "Now that's a nice purple shirt!"? The color
admiration doesn't always extend to other items.

A few years ago, my sister gave me a full set of purple luggage. It's
bright. I mean, not the "subtle color of purple, like dark eggplant,
that sometimes you see on the baggage return belt that makes it a
little different from all the black bags." No friends, this is the
"hey everyone, look at the GUY with the FLAMING PURPLE MATCHING

I should also point out that I received this gift immediately after I
got off stage at an out of town show we were playing. Big gift-
wrapped pile waiting for me in the middle of the audience.

But I love my sister, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't prone to
calling attention to myself in various ways, so I just played it as
par for the course. Which it was, and is. But initially, I was a bit
hesitant to embrace it. It was like grammar school all over again,
when I would beg and plead with my parents to let me wear docksiders
and white socks with my parochial school uniform, because that's what
everyone else who was a boy wore. And I was the kid with polished
loafers and dark green or black socks on a casual day. Don't even get
me started about being the ONLY kid who wore the uniform in gym class
until like 7th grade...

Anyway, this week I had to fly to Austin, TX. Simple enough, except I
was leaving via a little airport in White Plains, NY (international
designation my ass, it has 4 gates and you have to go outside onto the
tarmac) where the bit of flurries we got messed up incoming and
outgoing flights. Long story short (to late, I know), my flight was
delayed and I was left with a 3 minute layover in Detroit. So I took
the airline's offer to just reschedule the whole mess for the
following day.

"Your checked luggage has already been put on board. What color is
your luggage, so the crew can find it and return it to you?"

Proudly, I pronounced "Flaming Purple," much to her amusement and the
people around me. They found it in no time, and I was on my way back
home to wake for the 5am flight that I had been trying to avoid all

Either it was the luggage, or the roadcase of camera equipment and
wireless transmitters and receivers that doomed the rest of my trip.
Or the sudden changes to my flight itinerary, despite it being at the
airline's own hands. Anyway, I proceeded to get pulled aside for
"Special Search" all through my trip. Maybe it was the whole "same
name as an Irish bank robber wanted for millions even though he's like
30 years my senior". So I ended up getting groped by Homeland
Security at every checkpoint in my trip, having my carry-on laptop bag
and roadcase emptied out and swabbed constantly, and at one point
having the security lady take out a wireless receiver, with the dual
antenna and odd knobs and apparatus, and look at it weird and call her
supervisor over. Hell, I couldn't even check in electronically with
my flight number, and they had to over-ride the check-in system to let
me get on the flipping plane! But I'm used to that; never in my life
have I been allowed to breeze through check-in and scan my ticket/
punch in my flight number and move to the next line. And you thought I
stood out only for my love of purple? Nope. Sure, the woman next to
me who also got called for "special search" got the electronic wand.
Not me, I got Roman Hands to inspect me personally, can you please
close my laptop up because it's turning on and i want to save my
battery power so I don't have to sit between a drink vending machine
and a garbage can again outside the men's room because I'm trying to
leech off the power outlet.

At least my friend Ellen (you remember her from last week) bought me
fleecy purple socks that I'm wearing home. Thank you, they're comfy!

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Wanted: One princess, with size 6 shoe

I know, I get confused for Prince Charming ALL THE TIME. I'm just
kinda used to it now.

Here's a submission from someone who didn't want to be online, but
wears more purple than you and I put together. So she gave me one of
her shoes in proxy. But then when I went to return it to her, she'd

Does this fit you? Trying to find my purple princess!

Friday, January 23, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week - Back to our roots!

And no, i don't mean my hair, which is a bit less purple these days.
I'll have to do something about that...

This week's entry is from the muse herself, the person who planted the
seed for this blog in my head. Looks like she's got a nice purple
ensemble for Christmas and has decided to share it with you, dear

So you can thank Ellen for my hitting your inbox and RSS feeds every
Friday with this drivel. This is her purple shirt.

(How far can he take this without a single insertion of Barney or a
Teletubby? Tune in next week, and every week, to find out! (That
reminds me, Aileen still has my TinkyWinkie...))

Friday, January 16, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: Dedication

So I was having trouble coming up with something for today. Not that
there isn't material - i just wasn't feeling the purple today. But
then I was reminded that I have today's photo.

Katie is an amazing story. She is so dedicated, she has made Purple
part of her body.

Katie was a daredevil pilot who flew biplanes. One day, near
Sheboygan, WI while practicing quintuple barrel rolls, the Canadian
winds kicked up and her plane crashed in the forest. Unscathed save
for her pride, she began the heroic march back to civilization. On
the way she met a troop of cub scouts who were lost and famished from
being lost for a week without supplies. Unable to move, they had laid
down to die, so Katie picked all 7 of them up in her arms and
continued to find her way out of the forest. But then she was
attacked by a wild bear. She tried to run but the weight of the
children slowed her down, and bear caught her and bit off her foot!
She managed to fight back with a stick, until the bear ran off. Now
limping, she managed to carry the 5 remaining children out of the
forest to a road, where they found a rest stop and able to get help.
But the phones didn't work, so she had to use the smoke signals her
Native American grandmother had taught her growing up in New Mexico,
until help could arrive.

Her barnstorming days behind her, she now works in accounts payable
for a magazine publisher. She has had her foot replaced, which
explains how this picture came to be taken.

True story.

Friday, January 9, 2009

errr, something happened wrong...

Some people didn't get the image, as it didn't show up on the blog
page itself. Sorry. Fixed. If you saw the photo, ignore this post!

Purple Shirt of the Week: Rock and Roll

So you're probably wondering why a blog called "Purple Shirt of the Week" features things that aren't very shirt like. Actually, you might not be wondering that, since if you know me, you know it can be hard to keep me on-task. But allow me to explain the genesis of this wonderment, since it's not quite as random as the posts may have appeared until now:

Way back, probably in November of 2008, my friend Ellen and I were traveling, and she was telling me about how she lives in a house full of testosterone - a husband and two little boys - and they had just painted one of the boys rooms (and watch out HGTV, sounds like this kid knows his colors and has a mind of visions because his seemingly random colors pulled together quite nicely!) Anyway, somehow it came up that she's the only one in the house that appreciates colors like purple. which led to a discussion about my living room and full length velvet drapes. Somehow that led to this blog - my sending her the color purple every week.

And all of you are being dragged along- I mean, are along for the ride! I'm sure at some point you'll get to see her new Purple sweater she got for Christmas (ahem!)

This week's item is not a shirt (surprise!) but something much louder - literally. It's one of my guitars, a Peavy Predator, that used to be a trusty standard for me. I signed a deal with Godin Guitars a few years ago, and in the process, got one of their new (at the time) Triumphs (the silver one you see in the Cut Out video). Since then, I pretty much only use my Predator in the studio and take my stable of Godins with me - my love for them after all led to the deal. But in recognition of Talking to Walls climbing out of solitude and windowless rooms for the better part of 2008 and playing a full band show next Thursday at Two Boots in Bridgeport - and releasing our NEW EP "The Megan EP", I thought this appropriate.

If any of you Purple readers come to the show and say hi, maybe I'll pull the trusty 'ol Purple Predator out of the rack for a few songs. :)

If you would like to unsubscribe or complain about false advertising in the title of this blog, tell it to the comment box on this page, 'cause I just don't care.

Friday, January 2, 2009

Purple Shirt of the Week: The Loyal Fans

How wonderful it is to know that my Purple blog has given so many
people hope and meaning in their lives during these troubled times!
Thank you dear readers for all of your many showered affections and
applause. I don't think that was worded correctly, but isn't the
Internet's purpose to give forum to bad gramer n speling? Damn you

In the spirit of giving meaning, I am reminded of the writings of the
late, great Douglas Adams, who wrote (as writers do):

"The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass
through three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival,
Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why and Where
phases. For instance, the first phase is characterized by the question
"How can we eat?" the second by the question "Why do we eat?" and the
third by the question "Where shall we have lunch?"

I would like to append to that "What's the next purple blog and when
will my picture be in it?" My friend Michele here has been a staunch
supporter - neigh, the silent backbone of purpleness - since the very
beginning. She was to appear prior to now (Issue 2, Volume 1) but at
every opportunity, something has interrupted our blogginess.

So I proclaim today, January 2 to be "The Day of Purple Michele" to
make up for this malfeasance. All hail Michele!